This, to date, has to be the single most heart-breaking experience I have had when it comes to my love of all things small and living, especially spiders. I did something today that remains to haunt me yet it made me think about how we attach human emotion to the law of nature and how it is not our place to interfere, even though our intention may be good. My daughter called for me when she saw a bee get caught in a False House Button Spider's web. I knew it would be a good photo opportunity so I snatched up my camera on route to the scene. To watch the bee struggle so fiercely in the sticky silk while the spider was trying desperately to get a good bite was more than I could stand to bare and because of how important bees are to our environment I could not continue to take photographs as I felt like an accomplice to a murder. I put my camera down and pulled the bee out of the web while the spider scrambled for the safety of her hiding place. It was in those few seconds as I watched the little arachnid disappear that I realised what I had done. I had appointed myself as a ‘do-good-er’ agent by deciding what I thought was best for the bee. It was not at all my place to make that call because the bee was so tightly wound up in silk that its right wing was unable to come loose and I was afraid that if I tried to wipe the web off it would sting me and die anyway.
I was so torn by this complex situation because spiders are, before anything in the insect realm, my first love. I took it into my own hands to remove her really big catch, one she most likely won’t get for a while to save another important little life that inevitably will not survive anyhow because it cannot fly. An important lesson was learned today…let it be, if it’s too much for my sensitive soul to handle, turn around and walk away but nature takes its course the way it is intended, there is no emotion involved, it is what it is; survival of the fittest and all that. It is not my right, no matter how good my objective is, to impede on the way that natural law unfolds. I’m annoyed with myself for playing some sort of self-appointed god.
02 August 2014
There is no greater feeling than being acknowledged or validated for something you love doing. It’s not to say that we should attach ourselves to the need for validation because, well, folks are more concerned with themselves these days than anything or anyone else. Hard truth. Although once in a beautiful while, someone comes along and shows a genuine and very present interest in something that you are completely ardent about. What sends that sentiment screaming through the rooftops is when that endorsement comes from your child. Children call it like it is. There is no need for sugar coating, frills or fairy dusting; it is, in their minds, what it is.
Gabriel, my eight-year old son, bursts into my car as I collect him from school one afternoon, does his usual cheery “Hello Mommy!” greet with an enthusiastic peck to my mouth and off we head into the next journey of fetching his two older sisters while we chat about his day. He is suddenly jolted into recollection as he rips his bag open enthusiastically while scratching for something deep inside pronouncing excitedly, “Oh! Mommy I found something for you today! I was playing soccer with my friends and I saw this byoootifull (that’s how he pronounces it) feather that reminded me of you. I know how you love taking photographs so I stopped to pick it up and I took it to my bag so it didn’t get damaged. I thought you might like to take a photograph of it. Here we go”. He coolly hands me an unusually striking feather as my heart begins racing to the tune of a formula one race car headed for the number one spot without a fight. ‘Touched’ by this notion of love does not even scrape the insides of a bottomless chasm at how deeply I was moved. My heart, if a balloon would have positively detonated with the loudest bang at how my son made me feel on that afternoon adorned with the unexpected flood of love that filled my heart at what may have been a casual gesture for him but for me it was mammoth. Huge. It meant that he stopped to think about me. That a feather lost in flight having made its ride from the sky to the ground stopped my son in his playtime. He stopped. Picked it up and put it safely in his bag so that I, his Mommy, could take unprecedented pleasure in photographing it. He could have easily disregarded it, carried on with his soccer game and never given it a second thought. He didn’t.
I don’t know how long my son will bless me with free gifts from Mother Nature that make my heart pop because time has a way of removing the innocence and raw generosity of our young yet all I can assertively say is that as long as they keep on coming the gratitude that oozes from within me can never be compared to a gift that cost money to give. These are the gifts that keep on giving because the reminiscent glow of happiness that exudes from my depths every time I may recall, revisit the photograph or see another feather that evokes the memory of the day my son presented me with a feather that stopped him in his tracks will live with me forever.
The power of the emotion a photograph can evoke.
How I see it...
I see, speak and write in metaphors because I feel there is much we can learn from nature, people and our surroundings as depicted in my photographs and why I enjoy sharing my thoughts. Not in any attempt to convince or convert you to my way of thinking, seeing or feeling but to share how I see and experience MY mind map of the world. You at no time have to agree, all I ask is that my views and the views of others who wish to express theirs are kindly respected. So relax, get comfy and just enjoy. Happy reading!